Talia Marshall

Inspired by “Bluebirds”, a mural by Michael Conlin

I am in a white room. It is ghostly, how empty it is. Quietly humming is a beeping sound coming from the walls. I look for the source and find nothing. The beeping grows from a hum to a significant noise. It gets louder and louder the more that I look for it. I run around the room, the beeping now hurting my ears. I punch the walls with all my might, trying to stop the beeping. I do everything that I can but it just gets louder and louder and louder... I jolt awake, my eyes and ears throbbing and tears running down my plump cheeks. I am thrashing and yelling so violently that there are three doctors holding me down. Doctors? My ears are still ringing from the beeping sound and now I know why, as I bring my hands to my ears and curl up into a ball. When I awake again, my ears don’t hurt anymore. The machines are gone and so are the doctors. I am alone in a grey room with a white bed and grey hands... “no, no, no no no no. I-” I feel the rage creep up my spine like a train going as fast as it can to its destination. I yell and hit my white bed with all of my strength. I bolt off of my bed and sprint out of the room. I make my way to the door, wishing that they are tricking me. There is no way that I lost my color. No. I can’t. I burst out into the open air, eyes closed, and felt the breeze. I can imagine the orange flowers, green trees, lush vibrant bushes and gardens, but when I open my eyes... “Noo!..” I scream and collapse into myself on the grass. The grey, grey grass. I jump back up, and start to run. I run with tears soaking my face, clouding my vision, my limbs numb in the cool air. I run and run and run until I realize that I can’t run from my problems.

I inch my way back to my apartment and flop onto my bed. My beautiful oran-... grey cat walks up to me, a hurt look in her eyes. “I love you,” I whisper to her and scoop her into my arms. I stroke her head and rub her tummy. She purrs loudly and I hold her close, to comfort me and stop the tears running from my eyes. The eyes. The entrance to the soul, the connection between you and your consciousness. Once the color is gone, so are your memories of your inner connection. Once you find your inner connection (usually an animal) your world becomes colorful. You transform into your spirit animal and start a new life. My world was colorful. I was a.. Um, a uh.... Wow. I don’t even remember. I must’ve fell or died in that form, because everything that I had is gone now. Everything, everyone, me. Do I like sports? Am I afraid of heights? Do I like singing? Am I a musician? Am I an artist? Am I a plant? What am I?

“Do you know who I am?”

“Meow.”

“Ok,” I softly say with a sigh.

I awake to a beeping sound and for a split second I am terrified that I am back in the white room, until I breathe and realize that it is just my alarm. I get out of bed and pullon my running clothes and sneakers. I take a deep breath and step outside. I run through the road and onto the sidewalk. I keep running faster and faster, until a man appears in front of me and I nearly run into him.

“Whoa!”

“Sorry!”

“Oh, it's you” he says with a chuckle.

“Me?”

“Yes, I’ve been meaning to give you these.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a grey and white case. “I think you lost these,” he says as he slips the case into my hand. I look down at the design. It is grey and white, swirled into the pattern of feathers. Although I can’t see the colors, I can tell that it is beautiful. “Thank y-” I start to say but he’s gone. I walk for a little while before opening the case. It has a regular pair of glasses, with black rims and normal lenses. Why would he give me a pair of glasses? I thought that I had 20/20 vision. I put them on anyway in the case that I was wrong, but these are different glasses. I put them on and open my eyes. Before me stands a bustling city of blue and white and orange and red. I feel a tear streaming down my face. I have my color back. Behind me is a mural. Bluebirds flapping their wings, fighting against the harsh winds surrounding them. The picture brings back memories. Lots of memories, flooding around me like the puzzle piece was found.

It was a warm summer day. The ground had lots of flowers and the trees had lots of nests and buds. I sat in a branch of my favorite tree, the great willow. The breeze was warm and it ruffled my blue feathers. I stood up from the tree and fell. Halfway to the ground, I flapped my wings and soared into the sky. I balanced on drafts of wind and swirled in and out of clouds. I watched the ground below me looking for breakfast. I chirped my favorite song, and descended toward the ground.

All of a sudden the winds pick up. The mural seems to come alive and the birds flap around me getting bigger and bigger, wait no; I am getting smaller and smaller. The whirlpool of wind sends me up into the sky and I cheerfully sing with my friends. The glasses fall off and my worries are swept away, as I soared into the heavens with my family, the majestic bluebirds.

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